SHIVER THE DIARRHEA ROOT CANAL WHILE THE GRAIN RAINBOW SWALLOWS

Wondering if girls named Jessica come in any size other than obese.

CHOKING ON THE GROSS MISCONDUCT OF A PORTOBELLO TIARA

People who find Jim Gaffigan funny...

JEMAIS VU

The current youth is the generation of complacency.  What happened to giving a fuck about anything, even if that anything is giving a fuck about nothing.

Boost

Thinking of writing a new-wave Choose-Your-Own-Adventure: all the exits finish with a passive-aggressive tweet; #lol.

666.

Do Americans know how to do anything anymore: Magic 8-Ball app on my iPhone says, "Do you liek me?"

yolo

Now going to whine about being bored/not having money on facebook from the warmth of my mom's basement.

alt-lit

EITHER A BUM IS PISSING ON THE GROUND OUTSIDE MY APARTMENT DOOR OR IT'S RAINING AGAIN.

I visited a cemetery located in the hills around Hollywood yesterday.  When I arrived the clouds were slowly pushing past the hilltops and four deer stood in the graveyard quietly eating grass.

SOFT TUNNEL

Toshiaki Toyoda directed this video.  Feel like the marshmallow being is the physical manifestation of the sadness in all of us.

THE MILF WITH THE COCAINE STARE KEEPS TRYING TO TALK

The loneliness never goes away: a person is victimized by the weight or accepts its grace.

SPARROW BONES

If any of you are around when I have to meet my day, I don't want a long funeral. And if you get somebody to deliver the eulogy, tell them not to talk too long. Every now and then I wonder what I want them to say...I'd like somebody to mention that day, that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to give his life serving others. I'd like for somebody to say that day, that Martin Luther King, Jr., tried to love somebody. I want you to say that day, that I tried to be right on the war question. I want you to be able to say that day that I did try to feed the hungry. I want you to be able to say that day that I did try in my life to clothe those who were naked. I want you to say, on that day, that I did try, in my life, to visit those who were in prison. I want you to say that I tried to love and serve humanity.

NICK NOLTE HAS THE POTENTIAL TO BE MARY POPPINS WITH THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF COCAINE IN HIS BLOODSTREAM

Thinking about watching SCORPION KING 3 to see what it's like to be a normal american.