THE SIZE OF THE DOG DICK ISN'T IMPORTANT, THE SIZE OF THE INSECURITY IS.

I will utilize a silkscreen to create a t-shirt with the words "YOUR DICK IS SMALLER THAN MY DOG'S DICK" complimented by a black arrow graphic pointing downward to where my dog would be walking.  I will walk my dog in affluent neighborhoods while wearing the shirt.  Your children will know my name.